Heart!

20s are the ages when the so called "adult" tag is supposed to be associated with you. The best part is, it is expected from the knowledge imparted to you from the institutions attended before. I think more was learnt from the knowledge thwarted from you. I had learnt a lot about the quantification of nature and surroundings which humans had established until now. They called it "academics". They had even managed to organize this quantification resulting in a nomenclature of every field like science, social studies, Mathematics, etc. so that every learning human being is able to direct himself/herself towards a certain aspect of nature. 

I saw many people wondering about the thing that they want to do in their life. 20s form an age where majority is trying to figure out how to get a stable career, keep the family happy and ofcourse get the girl they want to settle with for a new family. There were many career options and the "organised quantification" was well established for every human to choose where they wanted to narrow down their minds into. There was a great invention made by humans for trade. This invention had the most popular name as "money". Most attractive fields were the ones where a person can attain maximum amount of this invention.  Luckily, I had decent amount of this invention to survive amongst the inventors. Family is a subjective perspective but I was extremely lucky to have one which was happy with whatever I do. Kudos to them!

Finally we arrive at the topic which is not institutionalized by humans just yet. Now this is seen as the most complicated and extremely simple thing by the same species. I think the idea of formulating nature is such a prejudice that when they are not able to do it, its complicated for them. I had that kind of prejudice and man, what an experience when it was simplified!

I don't know if you have figured out already but I was talking about love. Now there is no way I can quantify this. Its a feeling right? But formulating observations was my bread and butter. Can I do the same with this? I tried to develop a structure to it and realize if I can quantify. I had equations made out of feelings experienced by humans. I came up with my own constants. I thought I would help humanity by simplifying this weird randomness which noone was able to figure out yet. Then we would have institutions made for this field as well. I am not intelligent but I have a mind which is average enough to result in big things through hard work. But, not a single equation I came up with, satisfied all possible scenarios. I thought, may be I can introduce probability then. Randomness is best judged by probability right? 

I went back to basics and realized how useless it was to analyze something which is so inherent to any human being. When you talk about love, I don't know why, but the first thing that comes to mind in majority of the population is "Ahem ahem!", "Whose the girl?". Is it limited to that aspect? Is not love a feeling present between parents and their child, patriot and his nation, between siblings, etc. as well? The difference was unclear to me. The clarity was established when one understands difference between eating food given to you in a platter and eating some thing you cooked with someone. Parents, nation, siblings, all these things are something you have with you once you are born. Its surely a love that you have for your life and will remain with you for life. But the love established with them is part of your growing up. But when you love someone with an expectation of having a relationship, then you are realizing and establishing a new understanding with a stranger based upon your own persona. You spend your time and feel a new vibe that you want to share. 

It was then when I saw that defining this feeling might taint its purity. You just feel it, right? When you are at a hill top, early morning, and watch the orange red shades piercing through the sky slowly giving the glance of the most powerful thing; you are simply mesmerized. You look at the sunrise and you say "Its beautiful!". You simply cant define this feeling. You live it. Its the same with love! You don't describe the tantrums your parents had to bear. You don't write down the fights you had with your sibling. You cant experience a smile a soldier has when he dies for his country. You live it! Simple!

Social networking sites had managed to quantify the communication quite a bit.  Photos, background, hobbies, interests may be help in finding a new person but surely not enough for the new love you want to establish, right? I thought may be her first glance and then the first hi. Then, slowly unwrapping the behavioral traits she has to accommodate her into your life by regular talks, limericks and small gimmicks. A patient but beautiful accumulation of her words, thoughts and actions helps you find this new love. Now you experience the same sunrises every morning but two more eyes perceive the same beauty. You decide of having a life together being ready to challenge the things missed out and welcome the new things you are unaware of. 

There you are! You start a life together. You raise a child making sure he/she is synchronous with expected responsibilities of the society. The son/daughter tries to have his/her own passion that he/she want to live with. You live each day making sure a responsible human being is carved. You watch the child grasping things faster than ever and sometimes even feel proud that he/she knows being passionate in sync with societal responsibilities.Finally, you realize that he/she is writing about his/her perspective of "love" mentioning somewhere about you, by saying: "All these things are something you have with you once you are born!" 

That's right! The purest form of love was found by me residing in my parents for each other. They form the ultimate example of what love is. They never defined or expressed or even talked about it. They just lived it! It was simple and it was right there!

A Realization!

While running down the road to excel and rule the existing, an encounter with the mirror was a pause. The reflection was simply tired and wanted to rest. "Are you sure that you are running on the correct path?". I was perplexed. The memory inside me did not remember any such question asked by anyone including the brain himself. My obvious question was "Who decides what is correct?". The answer was, "The question is for you. Is this the correct path for you?".

That was the time when I realized the importance of rest. You run, so that you stay active, but a simple rest is important for the correct direction. The correctness is decided by the person himself. It involves the characteristics and interests of the individual for that moment and its mixture makes a personality. The development of a personality thus involves many amendments. But in the process, you realize what you are. Your efficiency in performance then synchronizes with the social needs. Once this realization is experienced, the appreciation for the current architecture of society is a feeling of rebirth. The rat races are non existent as now your companions are friends for the same goal - survival for significant contribution. The feeling of being a ruler is a feeling one wants just for a day because the next day you are responsible for infinite mistakes done by someone else and not everyone is grown enough to accept them. Excelling a field is a relative perspective because the inevitable uncertainties for any field due to obvious randomness ensures only a higher level of control. Questions with thyself are surely some of the best eyeopeners at least for me if not for everyone. I dont know if this is what is growing up but I like the feeling when some of the curiosities are resolved.

Once they are resolved, the freedom of, and for life destroys any fear which might have existed and would exist in life. Capabilities of individuals are defined by their guts to follow their passion and not by keeping it to thyself. Practical implementation of this trivial concept enthralls an audience fantasized inside some corner of this brain. The Pursuit of Happyness it is!

P.S.: I am a funny man!!

First day to inevitable!!

I am fine.

The first day - Bangalore started with a pool of vehicles thrashing the air infront of you without the care of slightest heart beat inside you. I was terrified more, once the gullies were witnessed with an arrow pointed from every luggage vehicle towards the human souls wandering to find the shortest path to reach the next point of travel. Anywayz, I reached my serviced apartment at peace with decent facilities to entertain me and luxurious living conditions.

Second day - I was not excited, nor was I thrilled to witness the first day at office. It was like a visit to some of the companies that you want to learn from. Everything is cool in this city. I mean everything - the weather, the people, the traffic inverse and even some of the animals. The entry into this office gave the taste of corporate lifestyle. The not so busy people showing there busy attitude, the fountains trembling to shower themselves and seek attention from some kind hearts, the buildings try to reach the sky so that the people inside can pride themselves of the heights they have reached. People are spellbound by such an atmosphere. I found it as an exit from the cheerful vibe the colleges carried.

Training sessions were conducted so that we could be equipped with the knowledge the company was carrying. An introduction was enough to understand that I understand nothing. The lunch at this place was one thing I liked, because of the participation from everyone in the four giants into this one place to share the efficacy some people had. The variation in the pace one eats was showcased with the gregarious atmospheres still persisting at some corners. I preferred the most inexpensive option to eat and gulped it down with the pace a normal human being might have. Once the bubbles cut my throats, I quenched the thirst and returned to the bombardment of connotations.

The evening arrived with the city lights fading the setting sun and the traffic showing you the way more clear than the dim sodium lamps. The room was set to poise me. I freshened myself with the scents. The dinner reminded home and I slept with the taste of the last bite.

Regards,
Rohit V. Pandharipande

Slog overs @ iitb

The thought of leaving this prestigious institute when I feel I have lots of questions unanswered, things are just starting to be explored to their potential level, and most importantly, to wave a bye to these freaking friends, is bumming!! Well, I am doing this for the fifth time in my life now. Emotions have died and the questions just keep accumulating. Life, huh!!

People around me are laughing a lot for the obvious reason that I have turned myself into a character of clown. Well atleast the laughter is around. The mere thought of managing everything by myself to have a living and introducing DISCIPLINE in my life, scares the hell out of me. Laughter is surely a requirement in such situations. A wise man (me ofcourse) said, if life is a vehicle, laughter is a fuel. But silence is the accelerator. I need to give that sometimes. Shit man!! Silence??

The slog overs have just started and I need to hit harder to have bigger targets for the chasers (Popularly known as juniors in colleges). Atleast, some motivation to work even when you know that whatever you are doing is of no f***ing help for the next step of your life. But wise men keep saying that nothing that you learn goes waste. Hope thats true!!

Long time!! Wassup?

These were the predominant lines in the last six months for various persons in life!! The aura was of chat. To answer this question for my life: First of all, MTech Project Stage 1, placed in Analog Devices and finally going through a selection procedure for PhD in Cambridge and thus in a job PhD dilemma. I dont like to praise myself much (I prefer people doing that for me. So comment really nicely). I went through some more "issues" ,except these, in parallel to the aforementioned tensions. To face all of them simultaneously was worth an experience. My hope was that they should melt down a little. But now with the continuous fight I had with myself, I feel I can handle it. (If not, some friends are really good). To learn that you learn by living, is a complicated but an awesome phenomena!! Complications complicate until you simplify it by a change in perspective of having a simple outlook to the defined problem. For more of these, login to facebook. I think people have such tag lines to release their stresses to the world.

Nowadays, my brain is a devil's workhop ( idle mind), with a slight pinch of academics (atleast a pinch is mandatory). Didnt know what to do on a Sunday (even though I have lots of studies to do), I thought of writing some stuff down.

I have lots of decisions to make and the worst part is: to be firm with the decision I make. How do you do that? It kills to be firm because of the exceptional adjustive nature I have. But as rightly said, anything extreme is bad. And I am a man of extremes. In short, I am bad!! Well, who isn't? Lets see how does it work out with the course of time.

Thats all I got for today it seems. I am quite confident that I will not blog for lot more days to come, but I hope to pick it up after reading some of the exceptional writing skills some of my friends have. I might not reach the unsurpassed level they have but atleast I could realize the reason to write things down!!

Meet you soon!! Till then, enjoy!! That helps!!

Multitasking!!

I am the last person to call if their is a job which requires multitasking. I refer to it as the "Alt-Tab" button of my brain by the analogy to its behavior on a Windows OS based systems. But the fact is you have to press it. The world needs a man who can manage whatever they want, even if they know how difficult it is and also how unrelated the things to be managed might be. I was in a kind of fallow patch for some days and was dying to have one of those experiences where things just pile upon and you need to calm down to schedule each one of them. Well, god listened to me and the reply was what I had asked for. So here I am. When I was having no work and day dreaming had reached it peaks, to write something on the blog seemed like an arduous task. But now when I am overloaded I feel like writing it down. I guess I just learned one more lesson of human psychology.

So, the weather is "balmy" (as referred to by one of the interviewees who took our tests and interview to check our communication skills (I scored an average.)), the roads are wet and the atmosphere is full of moisture (I know you expected some fantasizing word). My works include study, lab duties and family matters. God planned everything so that all of them falls in the same range of days. I just admire his confidence in me.

The best part of the whole thing is, I am actually looking forward to all of this. It is exciting me that I have so many jobs to do. I guess it is a part of your "growing up" phenomena of life...

See you at next post!!

Trying to retrieve the passion for studies!!

Lots of things occurred in my life after the previous post. I presented a poster at an international conference which was held here at IIT Bombay. I am/was(depends when you are reading this) the sports secretary of my department and thus was managing some sports activities. Helped out the council of my department for the event of traditional day. Helped in organizing a department trek. And finally, helping out the council to get my department mates a sweat shirt. By the way I am in the council as well (most probably).

Things are different when you deal with a lot of people. The calculations and planning change a lot. The obvious reason is the difference of opinion. I had always heard this concept, but it was fun to experience it.

This brings me to the field which I love the most - the basic fundae!!!

In my recent past, we were given a lecture on the basics of quantum mechanics by a big shot of IBM. My brain was dusted. It reminded me of those days when studies were done for passion rather than to get the pass to enter the gate of the next level of life. I looked into myself and realised, that I had lost the zing to question everything and get satisfied only when the reason reached the basics. Things have become applied now. The world wants a solution to a problem as fast as possible. Hence, the reason behind a concept is RUTTIFIED rather than understood. Anyways, enough of the boredom. I have again being triggered and am looking forward for joyous moments to unleash the power a human brain has!!!! (Apologies for the cliched)